Monday, July 27, 2009
Change in Plans
I have struggled with the decision to write this here but ultimately it is my place to vent, seek support, and share real life. Sometimes life surprises you and bites you in the ass. At six weeks pregnant I am having a miscarriage. Notice I didn't say "had" because in all honesty it is quite the long drawn out process. I started bleeding on Saturday and blood tests today confirmed that I am, in fact, miscarrying. I just took for granted that everything went off without a hitch the first time around and this would be the same. We had told our parents and most of our extended family. I even made Grace a "Big Sister" t-shirt. We were so excited and it happened right on schedule and according to our "plan". It is a heartbreaking lesson that life doesn't always go "according to plan". I guess I just have to have faith and to trust that God has a different plan for our family.
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I'm so sorry for your loss. I know words don't make it any better... I'm sending positive vibes your way.
ReplyDeleteOh Jane, I'm so sorry you're going through this. I truly am. I know the thoughts that must be racing through your head, but, you have to believe that for whatever reason this is happening, it's meant to be. For the pain and suffering that you're feeling, I wish you strength and patience. Big hugs to you (and Adam)!! So sorry. :(
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine what you must be feeling, wish you didn't have to go through this. Hang in there. We are thinking of you guys.
ReplyDeleteI tune into your blog every now and then and today I was saddened to see what you blogged about. I am so sorry! I cant relate because I have never had this happen but I can only imagine that it is really hard. Life works in mysterious ways....so hang in there and be strong for Miss G :-)
ReplyDeleteJane- ((hugs)) I am sooo sorry to hear that this is happening. Hang in there and I am here if you need to chat.
ReplyDeleteoh jane, i'm so sorry. i can't even imagine. in my mind i figure our second will be as 'easy' as the first, but you're right, we can't take it for granted. sending hugs your way...
ReplyDeleteHang in there Jane. I've been thinking about you the past couple days and hope that you will find strength in this. I know its so hard to view it this way but the way I look at my miscarriage was that if I had had that baby, I would never have had Porter... he never would have been. It all happens for a reason as shitty as that is. It really is shitty. No other way to explain it. I am so sorry you're having to go through this but know that you're not alone, that whatever anger, hate, frustration and sadness you feel is normal and okay. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteI cant say that I understand the feelings of a miscarriage, but I do understand the disapointment of having your "plans" not work out for you. It is frustrating and hard to understand why. You just have to keep faith that God does have this planned out how he wants it done. There is a reason for this happening, and maybe its to touch someone else that happens to hear your story or your blog later down the road. And then you are there to be their shoulder and listening ear. Until then, we are here for you!
ReplyDeleteJane~ I miscarried between Austin and Audrey. I had only known for a few days about the pregnancy but was completely devestated when I lost the baby. Like Nicole said about Porter, I wouldn't have my Audrey if I had gone full term with that pregnancy. And you're right, after one healthy pregnancy you take it all for granted not even stopping to think that things do sometimes go wrong. I thought the same thing, too. God has great plans for your little family!
ReplyDeleteSo sorry, Jane. I wish I had some words of encouragement or advice, but I don't. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteI seriously started crying when I read this. I read your blog all the time and it always brightens my day. I was heartbroken to read what you are going through right now and wish that I could hug you. You are so strong. I love you so much. Please call if you need anything or just want to chat. (from a medical standpoint I want you to know that you have done absolutely nothing wrong...50% of all pregnancies end in miscarraige...most people do not even know they are pregnant at 6wks and so the miscarraige just looks like a late period.) it will absolutely happen for you again and when it does you and adam will make another perfect miracle.
ReplyDeleteAgain, I am so very sorry Jane. I know so many women who have gone through the heartbreak of a miscarriage. I cannot even imagine. For them, I say thank you for sharing your story. Miscarriage is something that is often "brushed under the rug" and many women and families suffer and hurt in silence. I hope that God's love surrounds you during this time and the painful days and weeks that are sure to follow.
ReplyDeleteWhat sad news - my thoughts and prayers are with you.
ReplyDeleteSorry :( I haven't ever went through this, so I really don't know what to say other then keep your chin up and as hard as it is to believe at a time like this things really do happen for a reason. Only God knows his reason! But stay strong!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear your news. God works in mysterious ways. There is always a reason for why things happen even if the reason remains unknown. He will bless you with another beautiful, healthy baby. Your in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteJane- I'm so sorry this is happening to you guys, I think a lot of us take for granted this journey of pregnancy, I know I do until I hear other's stories. Hopefully you will find peace and strength during this difficult time....I'll be thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteJane - My name is Amanda and I found your blog through Karen's blog "The Gaston Family".
ReplyDeleteI saw your post title and felt immediately pulled to leave you a message. I, too, have miscarried. Three times, actually. The first and third weren't discovered until later on in the pregnancy (nearly 14 weeks) but the second one was around 6 weeks. And it sucked. It wasn't fun or nice or easy...it often seems that loss of a pregnancy is kept quiet, like it's not a big deal to some.
But it IS.
Please rest and if you need the pain medication, take it. Don't be strong if you don't want to be. I tried to be Superwoman when I all I wanted to do was cry.
Know that I am praying for you, your husband, your daughter and families. I understand and I am so terribly sorry. Just know that there are, unfortunately, so many that have walked this walked and are there to help you.
Praying for you in Michigan.
Oh Jane, I was so surprised to read your post today... and so sorry for this unexpected heartache for your family. Hang in there, know that so many people are praying for you, and rest assured that God has great plans for your little family.
ReplyDeleteJane, I am so sorry...I will be praying for you and your family...
ReplyDelete